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Today’s Unemployment Tip encourages you to know the law in your continued attempt to survive being unemployed. Why do you need to know the law? Because it’s only when you know the law that you can get around The Law…by obeying it. The men and women of law enforcement, The Law, or “Johnny Law” as [...]
Are you a college-aged unemployed white-guy with facial hair looking to score a few extra bucks? Yeah, me too! You should consider donating plasma*! You too can be apart of this painful time-consuming experience that has been rumored to help save lives. If you’re curious what your plasma (Human AB Serum) goes for on the [...]
Let’s be honest, surprises are great! Yesterday the Post Office delivered a surprise right to my mailbox… It was a check! The check was for my Webguide “audition.” All day I’ve been thinking about how to spend all the money. I think I’ve got it figured out… I’m going to buy a tank of gas [...]
Before 9AM three creditors called. Feeling too sleepy to speak directly to their concerns, I let my voicemail do the busy work. Rolling over, I closed my eyes and attempted to sleep for another hour. Between 9AM and 10AM my phone rang four more times. I became frustrated with my creditor’s insistence that I pay [...]
Yesterday was a bitch. Things just felt off. Not just for me, for the entire cast! An actor’s uncle died. An actor’s car was broken in to. An actor’s neck is in pain. An actor’s ankle is twisted. My stage-girlfriend went home sick, thus our dance sequences have been cut from the opening and closing [...]
For the past few weeks I’ve been spending my nights in a western suburb rehearsing for a show called, “Christmas Attitudes.” It was supposed to open on Thursday for a sold-out corporate event, but the show was cancelled when the company bailed. Tonight the show will really open… We hope. What was four performances has [...]
This morning at 9AM my phone rang. MEHello, this is Michael.THEMHello? Is this Michael?MEYes, this is Michael.THEMMichael VANske?MENo. I’m afraid you have the wrong number. This is Michael VENske.THEMOh, I’m sorry sir. MEWhat is this regarding?THEMMy name is Susan and I’m calling on behalf of your credit card company. It seems you missed your last [...]
Times are economically tough my friends… Being short on cash is never fun, so I’ve decided to turn a passion of mine into cold-hard-cash: I’m going to be a guinea pig for clinical trials. You can’t tell me that’s not a brilliant idea! Learn where I got the inspiration in this story here. If I [...]
Damn you, Ramsey County! For the second time this year, I have to go to your court to contest your stupid “laws.” Remember my first visit? It is my hope that the court will see honesty in my eyes and waive the $237 ticket. What did you do? Two things. First: According to Deputy Olson, [...]
Dear State of Minnesota, I’m drowning. You can throw out that life-preserver made of money anytime now. Gasping, Michael
“I need your rent money!” “Or we could have the sex.” How does he get those pants off so quick? “Stop looking at my balls.”kiddo + walkonred
The State of Minnesota and I are fighting. I’m fighting for my right to unemployment wages. They’re fighting to prevent me from obtaining them. On Thursday I received a document that needed my initials. I initialed the document and faxed it back to the state. On Saturday I received a ten-page document that I need [...]
On my birthday Johnny Law issued me two tickets, one for parking in a no parking zone, the other for expired tabs. My car didn’t display current tabs on the license plates. I parked next to a sign that read: “No parking except on holidays.” I’m not a stupid person, I know I deserved the [...]
Scooter Quest ’08 leaves in… I can’t believe it! If you’d like to help out Team Awesome, please throw a few bucks our way. You can donate by clicking here or here. Or if you’d like to donate directly to Shirley and me, click to see my wish list. If not, that’s cool too. I [...]
Plagued by the reality that I’m bad with money (remember this), I decided to see what I spend my money on. I spent six hours sifting through my bank statements and organized a lovely spreadsheet that I hope will guide my spending habits for the comings months. Keep in mind that actual cash transactions were [...]
(Twelve individuals are seated on metal folding chairs in a circle, in a stuffy run-down community center room. On a rickety table in the corner, a coffee pot percolates next to stale bagels and warm fat-free cream cheese. A MAN stands and begins to “heal.”) MANHi…um… My name is – WOMANJust your first name. MANMy [...]
Even though I had the foresight to write about how I’d be spending my stimulus check (here), I absentmindedly helped the economy instead. Oops! I stopped at Target and accidentally spent $231… I shot over to MGM Liquor Warehouse to buy another bottle of 45th Parallel and 18 bottles of wine to feed my additions… [...]
Today marks the beginning of 30 years of writing a monthly mortgage payment. Honestly, I’m kinda scared. 30 years is a long time. The bank says I’d be 52 when I pay the loan off, but I’m seriously looking to pay it off in less then half that. Believe me, I’m literally saving my pennies. [...]
This morning I had a mandatory call-in meeting for work at 7:30AM. I love and hate those meetings. I love that I can be hung-over naked in bed on a conference call with my boss and co-workers. That’s a naughty bonus. I hate that the call was so early (by my standards). I hate that [...]
I’m out. Officially out of east Saint Paul. Officially out of being a renter. Officially out of rush hour and suburbia. It’s (officially) such a beautiful relief. Fourteen months ago moving fifteen miles east of Minneapolis seemed like a grand idea. I would be saving money in rent. Katherine was going to move in and [...]
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- I'd do it! RT @StarTribune: Imagine human hibernation. http://bit.ly/hwx444
- (cont) ...either people really like spending time with paint fumes contained on the lower-level, or people are hard-up for cash. #economy
- My boss asked me to post an ad on Craigslist looking for a laborer to paint a basement at $10/hr. I've received over 50 apps... (cont)
- Will be posting for @bloggerstock in the next few moments - standby...
- Looking forward to putting it into words! RT @20sb Blog Swap topic is: Action. What are you gonna do next year that you've put off too long?
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